scare of my life

A mothers worse fear is that something would happen to her children. Tensions in Lebanon are so thick and just flat out unpredictable. Today was supposed to be a good day with life returning to somewhat normal after a worker strike. Then my heart dropped. My daughter went downstairs to do the regular pick up for the boys and was met with news that bad things were going on. So she buzzed up and told me something bad was happening.

When I turned to the news I saw cars burning on a bridge that is near their school and I panicked. I kept thinking please let them be ok. Please please let them be ok. I tried to call the driver and I kept getting nothing. I got even more worried. I quickly got dressed and went downstairs, my daughter ran across the street to ask my mother in law for the number to the school. My sister in law was there and asked what was happening so she had her turn to the news. She too tried to call her driver and still nothing.

Meanwhile I was downstairs trying not to make a scene crying but the door guy, Osman, in Arabic was trying to tell me not to worry. He kept running in the middle of the street to see if the bus was coming and he turned and shook his head YES! Thank God. I was so relieved to know that they were coming. My heart pounding too much and shaking. All the times I raised my voice to them, or maybe spanked them too hard…trying to think if I hugged them enough before school. All these thoughts raced through my mind because of the not knowing if they made it through that mess.

It was all happening on the roads they had to go on to get home. I later found out that the 8 cars I saw burning on the bridge were abandoned by the people that were in them because of the fighting that had broken out. I also found out that the fighting started in the cafeteria at the Beirut Arab University. There apparently was an argument and it escalated with people taking sides obviously, and it grew from there. My husband informed me that anyone who is actually from Beirut would never have been messing up their neighbor hoods. He said more than likely and what is usually the case, it is people that are from outside of Beirut attending the colleges.

They respect nothing or no one other than their group. Yes, Shia against Sunni. There was times when people were stopping people and checking their ID's. Here in Lebanon you have to have which sect you belong to. Shia, Sunni, Christian etc. So the Shia were stopping people and if it said Sunni, they started to beat up the person. Of course not if it is a woman…just the men. The soldiers were trying to get the women to safety and people here by us were asking to use the land lines because the mobile service has been cut. I assumed to prevent the rioters from calling in more to come fight. They are just making a mess of things.

My daughter really wanted to go out today to Spinney's. It's a store here and they have like a McDonalds and Starbucks etc there. I am very happy that I was feeling lazy today and not wanting to go out. It just spun out of control and the men that are fighting are just raging out of control. People are getting hurt and properties are being destroyed. I wish they would go away because they are destroying the image of a beautiful city that has such friendly and beautiful people. My husband is giving it one day and if it is not resolved me and the kids will head to NY. I hate to leave my home but what can you do? I mean, the war last year we hung in there and we were fortunate not to be targets. The Shia were the targets then but now, it's a sectarian battle that could possibly turn into a civil war. One for sure my husband stated would not be good at all.

You know in the US we have things like this happen but there is just like more control over it and for the most part it is under control but over here, what I would give to see that new machine I saw on the news today that they intend to use for riot control. What it does is emit some type of ray that causes the skin to itch or burn, one of the two..would have come in handy for a day like today.

Anyhow, it was sad to see them breaking up walls and taking pieces of buildings to try and throw at others. Nonsense. If only people could know and see others that are not like this. When they show Muslims on television they only show the bad. They never show anything good. I mean how would we feel in the US if all they every showed were bad Christians or bad blacks etc etc.? Anyhow, I just wish people could see the Lebanon I know and have come to love.

One day hopefully this country will get back on it's feet. Israel didn't help matters any and again, that is a whole other story…undoubtedly to be continued. Tomorrow I will see what will happen and I just hope that they stop. In the meantime I am readying my bags so that I can be prepared to leave in the event it gets worse. We shall see.